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Big Whopper Whips Lifter

Always wanted to have a shot at being a ring announcer. Don’t have the magnificent voice of a Michael Buffer, but possess the sparking persona that more than makes up for it.

And, I finally got my chance at the Olympia Expo, when I was the man at the mic for the long sought after match between Yogi (The Big Whopper) Avidan and Isaac (Lifter) Hinds.

Even though I thought Avidan was a wuss, he did have a 40-pound weight advantage at 6’1” and 260 over the 5’11”, 220-pound Hinds, and still was my pre-fight favorite. But, since neither one of them can see without their glasses (neither can I, but I didn’t have to aim and slug anybody), I really wondered if either of them would actually land a punch.

As you can see by the video shot by, I was way wrong. Yogi was mean as hell, and Lifter, though trying to be the tough guy, was pummeled by Avidan en route to a unanimous victory for the Big Whopper in the two-round bout.

As you can also see on the video, the blind bats ended up belting me instead of each other along the way, and I landed flat on my back. The trouper that I am, however, I was able to still keep the mic in my hand, and the commentary flowing. Those who know me aren’t surprised in the least.

Hinds, a bit drained, in more ways than one, since he was up for 48 consecutive hours, didn’t make any excuses, but promptly demanded a rematch at the 2009 Arnold Sports Festival weekend in March. As the official ring announcer again, and handicapper of this handicapped event, I list The Big Whopper as a 3-1 favorite to make it two victories in a row.

But, I may have to call this one outside the ring.

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